Hello! If you can’t access the show, that’s because something is going on behind the scenes with the feed. Should be fixed soon!
In case useful to you, the RSS address is: https://rss.art19.com/the-allusionist
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Hello! If you can’t access the show, that’s because something is going on behind the scenes with the feed. Should be fixed soon!
In case useful to you, the RSS address is: https://rss.art19.com/the-allusionist
Welcome to four letter word season!
We're kicking off with one of the most versatile words: it can be a noun, verb, punctuation, expostulation, full sentence on its own; it can be an intensifier, an insult and a compliment... and a Category A swear. Thus, of course, content note: this episode contains many category A swears, plus some sexual references.
Read moreHi, here I am on vacation in Norway, peeking out of a hole in the middle of a large sculpture made out of shiny multifaceted metal to reflect the trees and mountains around it.
Hello! It's me, your real imaginary friend, Helen Zaltzman.
Someone wrote to me recently saying, “I haven't seen a new episode, are you OK?” I'm OK, thank you! I took a break for some work things such as the return of my other podcast Answer Me This, and also to have a vacation. Hadn't had one of those for a bit. It was very nice. Strongly recommend vacation.
But the show will be back on the 9th May with a season about… four letter words! That's right: some of your favourite category A swears - and some not swears. If you have some favourite four letter words you want me to investigate, let me know.
There will be some behind the scenes podfeed shenanigans happening before then.So if you don't see more Allusionist appearing in your pod feed by 10th of May, then you're going to have to search for it in your podcast app and resubscribe because your subscription will have been kicked off by the behind the scenes shenanigans. And always the show is up to date at theallusionist.org.
Other news: live Allusionist shows are coming to Toronto on the 1st of June and Montréal on the 9th of June. We will be performing our very entertaining live show Souvenirs, which features some ancient swearing history that messes up our technology nearly a thousand years later, as well as the incredible story of a friendship torn asunder by a typeface. Plus, I'll be selling my hand-drawn tea towels, and anyone who comes along gets a free bookmark illustrated by me also.
Get your tickets now at theallusionist.org/events and I'll be back in your ears on May the 9th. Farewell! - HZ
And if you just need to shut off your internal monologue for a bit, you can replace it with a relaxingly scored list of gay animals.
Happy tenth birthday to this show! To celebrate, here's every randomly selected word from the dictionary from the first decade of the show.
Read moreIt's the annual parade of Bonus Bits - things this year's guests said that I couldn't fit into their episodes, and/or weren't about language, but now is their time to shine.
We've got tricorn hats, changing your dog's name, Boston cream pie, parmesan vs vomit, the placebo effect's negative sibling, the universal blank, headache poetry and bawdy riddles. And more!
Read moreOver four livestreams, 19-22 December 2024 starting each day at 12:30pm PT/3:30pm ET/20:30 UTC/check your timezone, I’m reading A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, with musical and visual accompaniment by Martin Austwick. Join us, all are welcome! It’ll be fun if you want, or lulling you to sleep if you don’t want. It’ll be festive if you want, or a tale of jerks learning a hard lesson if you don’t. The sidebar chat will be a great time; that, we can count on.
All the videos are at youtube.com/allusionistshow, specifically in the Allusionist Reads playlist. And if you can’t make the livestreams, they’ll be available not-live afterwards there too. Plus they are embedded downpost for your convenience.
Also, now's the optimal time to listen to the various Festivelusionists, about such things as Winterval and the many names for Santa, and real life Christmas elves, and the most frequently occurring words in Christmas songs (includes my evergreen ditty about meat sweats), but especially the one about why Christmas got so Dickensy. They are gathered in this playlist: theallusionist.org/festivelusionist.
Ho ho ho bah humbug,
HZ
The Allusionist reads A Christmas Carol, stave 1: Marley’s Ghost.
Scrooge is going about his daytime business of work, more work, and making other people's lives worse. Then that night he is visited by the ghost of his late business partner Jacob Marley, and guess what: business ghosts are not fun ghosts.
The Allusionist reads A Christmas Carol, stave 2: The Ghost of Christmas Past.
Scrooge is visited by the ghost of Christmas Past and is taken on a whistlestop tour of festivities from his boyhood and earlier adulthood, so he gets to see himself becoming ever more of a prick.
The Allusionist reads A Christmas Carol, stave 3: The Ghost of Christmas Present.
Scrooge is visited by the ghost of Christmas Present and is shown a whole lot of festive partayyyyyyyyyy, to which he himself is not, er, party. Also: the poor lil mite Tiny Tim. He'll be ok, right? Right??
The Allusionist reads A Christmas Carol, stave 4: The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come, and stave 5: Christmas Day.
In Stave 4, Scrooge is visited by the ghost of Christmas Yet to Come, and gives him some pretty scary life spoilers! Unless... Scrooge becomes a changed man? Tune into Stave 5 to find out!!
In Lexicat part 1, we met the author Mary Robinette Kowal and her cat Elsie, and learned about how they communicate via a set of buttons programmed with words. In part 2, two talking dogs, Bastian and Parker - and their humans, Joelle Andres and Sascha Crasnow - join us too, and explain how they discovered some very unexpected things about what their animal companions are thinking and feeling thanks to the buttons, and how they changed the ways they communicate with other humans too. And animal behaviour expert Zazie Todd gives us some tips for interpreting cats’ and dogs’ body language.
Read moreIt’s a portmanteau that became shorthand for the War On Christmas™, with a side of ‘political correctness gone mad’. But this is very unfair to Winterval.
There's a word that has become shorthand for 'the war on Christmas' with a side of 'political correctness gone mad': Winterval. It began in November 1998. Newspapers furiously accused Birmingham City Council of renaming Christmas when it ran festive ev...
That mythical beardy man who supposedly gives children presents at Christmas - what’s he all about, and why does he have so many different names? Also, why were Victorian Christmas cards so scary and meaty?
CONTENT WARNING: Be wary of listening to this episode around young children, as there may be life spoilers. Historian Greg Jenner traces the origins of that mythical beardy man who turns up in December with gifts.
Charles Dickens wrote about the plight of the impoverished and destitute members of British society. So how come his name is a synonym for rosy-cheeked, full-stomached, fattened-goose, hearty merry “God bless us every one” Christmas? Plus: a trip to Dickensian London, recreated in an expo centre in California.
Charles Dickens wrote about the plight of the impoverished and destitute members of British society. So how come his name is a synonym for rosy-cheeked, full-stomached, fattened-goose, hearty merry "God bless us every one" Christmas?
Jim Glaub and Dylan Parker didn’t think too much of it when, every year, a few letters for Santa were delivered to their New York apartment addressed to Santa. But then one year, 400 letters arrived. And they decided they had to answer them.
Jim Glaub and Dylan Parker didn't think too much of it when, every year, a few letters were delivered to their New York apartment addressed to Santa. But then one year, 400 letters arrived. And they decided they had to answer them.
It’s a very sweet story, but they’re still doing it and now have a non-profit — if you want to be a Santa for a kid in need, you can donate or get involved at miracleon22ndstreet.com
The usual canon of holly jolly Christmas songs didn’t really fit the mood of 2020. So Jenny Owen Youngs, Martin Austwick and I wrote one that does. And it’s a banger!
The usual canon of Christmas songs may not really fit people's moods in this year 2020, when I'm not sure a lot of us are feeling all that holly jolly. So I drafted in singer and songwriter Jenny Owen Youngs and we wrote a festive song that is suitable for 2020.
Elsie the cat has a set of 120 buttons programmed with words. She uses them to lie, swear, apologise, express grief and frustration and love to her human, the author Mary Robinette Kowal, who talks about what's involved in learning to communicate via language buttons with companion animals. And animal behaviour expert Zazie Todd explains how animals might be interacting with human language.
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