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Alexinomia is the aversion to saying people's names. Psychologist Thomas Ditye explains what it means to have this condition - in some cases not even saying your spouse's name during 25 years of marriage - and the research he and colleague Lisa Welleschik are doing to learn more about it.
Find their work (and tell them about your alexinomia, if you have it) at alexinomia.org.
Alexinomia has some things in common with the phobia discussion last episode, so listen to that. Else I’ll set a scary clown on you.
EXTRA MATERIALS:
Here is the questionnaire Thomas mentions, to help determine whether the respondent has alexinomia or not.
The 2025 paper Lisa and Thomas co-authored: Name avoidance in social anxiety: Understanding Alexinomia.
And their 2024 paper “Why can’t I say people’s names?” Alexinomia as a widespread psychological phenomenon.
From 2023: Alexinomia: The fear of using personal names.
Lisa presents some case studies of people who experience alexinomia.
“Say Not Her Name!” The Socio-Cultural Significance of Personal Name Avoidance Strategies for Shona Married Women: “…the language and forms of honorifics in Shona, a cultural practice that is threatened by extinction as a result of alienating forces. Name-avoidance socio-cultural practices are highly endangered in contemporary societies.”
Alexithymia also came up in the Misophonia episode.
Eight (!) years ago, we had the Name Therapy episode, addressing your problems with your own names. Maybe we should do another? I always, always love hearing people’s thoughts and feelings about their names. Let me know yours if you’d like to.
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YOUR RANDOMLY SELECTED WORD FROM THE DICTIONARY:
tales, noun, law: a writ for summoning substitute jurors when the original jury has become deficient in number.
Origin: from Latin tales (de circumstantibus) 'such (of the by-standers)’, the first words of the writ.
CREDITS:
Thomas Ditye is a psychologist, psychotherapist and an assistant professor at Sigmund Freud University in Vienna. Find his work on alexinomia at alexinomia.org.
This episode was produced by me, Helen Zaltzman. Music and editorial assistance were provided by Martin Austwick. Download his songs at palebirdmusic.com and listen to his podcasts Song By Song and Neutrino Watch, and the podcast we are both in, Answer Me This.
Find the Allusionist at youtube.com/allusionistshow, instagram.com/allusionistshow, facebook.com/allusionistshow, @allusionistshow.bsky.social… If I’m there, I’m there as @allusionistshow.
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